I can still remember the physical torture of those early weeks of parenthood, when merely raising your arms over your head while taking a shower hurt. Your back and shoulders ache from carrying a newborn. Your eyes burn from being open so damn much. If breastfeeding, your nipples feel like a beaver was using them for training practice.

Add in a busy toddler, and it’s a wonder the four of us survived unscathed after Alice was born.

The one aspect of new parenthood (again) I was most worried about was breastfeeding. While the recollection of labour pain fades so quickly, my Girls were cringing daily at the memory of learning to breastfeed with Lucy — the hours spent learning to latch, the bleeding nipples, the lingering hole she chewed on my right side, the tears of frustration as pumping brought no milk.

Discover Birth, a local group of women specializing in childbirth, breastfeeding and post-partum care, offered help. (Actually, owner Stefanie first offered us a labour doula, which I turned down. For us, having a virtual stranger in the delivery room would have been uncomfortable. Maybe if we’d met sooner? I dunno. But I do know many women who’ve used doulas while giving birth and LOVED them.)

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Like most new-parents-to-be, Eric and I took a pre-natal class at our local hospital.

(I wrote about it here and here.)

I remember being entranced by the other bellies in the room, all about the same rotundness as mine. And being in complete denial about how the baby was going to come out of me — more specifically, how a watermelon was coming out of an area most definitely not watermelon in size.

I was absolutely, 100% terrified. And my legs were crossed vey tightly.

And not once did I ever entertain the idea of giving birth without drugs. Because I am a wimp with ZERO pain tolerance. But at least I recognize it (which is why I waddled into the birthing suite panting for them. Eric hadn’t even put my bag down yet and I was huffing to the nurses to page Dr. Druggie, and when that needle slid into my back it was like the best piece of food my lips had ever touched, the best glass of wine except it washed over my whole body like I imagine an orgasm would feel, but not like I know what that’s like because my father reads this site. Hi Dad!).

Even with the knowledge that I’d be numb from the waist down as soon as medically possible, I still greatly benefited from Valerie’s exceptional class. You can only glean so much knowledge from other moms and the scary Internet, so learning about the different labour stages and breathing exercises and contraction positions was excellent.

It took some of the fear away, because it was mostly fear of the unknown.

And even though my drug plan worked out, we all know how unpredictable labour can be, so I’d have been prepared for the worst. And the worst in my books was delivery with no meds.

Val also covered C-section and home deliveries, natural childbirth, recovery, what to bring to the hospital, birth plans and more — it wasn’t the stereotypical hee-hee-whoo stuff from TV.

The Durham Lamaze Association runs all kinds of public and private classes throughout the Region. Check them out at www.durhamlamazeassociation.com. Val and I are still in touch, and she’s a fabulous resource for before and after birth. Reach her at sandv@sympatico.ca or 905-723-7373.