The Consumer Product Safety people are recalling these cute animal head blankets by Lil Snugglers because…

…are you ready for the potentially deadly risk?…

…the satin edging can come off, potentially strangling a child.

*sigh*

I think the Safety Police have inhaled too many fumes from testing flammable lingerie.

We got us some potentially poisonous pears, people!

(I worked hard on that.)

President’s Choice and Beech Nut are recalling their respective toddler pear juices from concentrate, as they may be tainted with arsenic.

Get all the info here, or call Loblaws Customer Relations at 1-888-495-5111, or the Canadian Food Inspection Agency at 1-800-442-2342 / TTY 1-800-465-7735.

Two things strike me as unusual here…

First, why is one juice labeled as organic and one not? Is the PC juice really organic? Or are they just processed in the same plant?

Second, how does arsenic maybe get into toddler pear juice? Did some psycho worker just happen to sprinkle some in a giant vat? Is it used in production somewhere? Why was it even in the plant?

So many questions surround the poisonous pears.

I actually love the Cherokee brand, so this is upsetting. Apparently the sleeper buttons have too much lead. See details here.

The CBC has a great site of product recalls, one that gets updated so often — which is really disturbing — it’s hard to keep up. Visit the site to see the latest, including wooden blocks and train sets,  remote-controlled cars, and dollar store glue guns that shock users then catch fire.

(Note to self: Do not buy electric items from dollar store.)

And don’t forget about our extensive list of safety and support groups in Durham and beyond, found here.

Wouldn’t you love to be part of the federal government’s consumer product safety division?:

“Black sheer baby-doll and panty lingerie set, 100% polyester with marabou feather trim

Health Canada’s sampling and testing program revealed that flammability of the marabou trim used on the lingerie exceeds the allowable limit for clothing textiles. The lingerie could easily catch fire and cause serious burns to consumers if exposed to a heat source such as a candle, cigarette lighter or stove burner.”

Perhaps the department’s manager decided to “slip into something more comfortable” and happened to drop some cigarette ashes on her negligee after some afternoon nookie in the stock room with Bob from accounting. Can you imagine explaining that one?

Also, it kills me that they tested it near a stove burner. If you’re stupid enough to be getting it on in your kitchen beside a hot element, then perhaps you deserve to catch on fire. Of course, if you’re in to that kind of thing, well…

Perhaps it’s time to move on.

Look! A sashaying Tinker Bell lamp has too much lead!

Infantino lion teethers: The nose that chokes.

Hooker Furniture bunk beds: Strangulation risk.

Horseshoe magnets: Excessive lead.

Oceanic and AERIS SCUBA Regulator First Stages: Uncontrolled air flow.

Xplory strollers: Front wheel can fall off.

Tot Tower Blocks: Peel-able label can cause choking.

Let’s kick the weekend off with a blast, shall we? Here are the latest product safety recalls — one of which we own!

• The First Years 3-in-1 flush & sounds Winnie the Pooh potty (lead)
• The First Years reclining feeding seat (malfunctioning straps, thus falling risk — we own this one, and have never had a problem…)
• Starbucks fusion mugs (scalding risk from loose handle)
• Old Navy performance fleece boy’s jacket (strangulation risk)
• Collectible horse ornaments (lead)
• Crystal innovations jewelery (lead)
• Metal jewelery by Colossal Jewelery (lead)
• DesignWare confetti bursts (lead)
• Kidzone wrestling figure (lead)
• Toy bus (lead)
• Mighty Wheels power shovel (lead)

Curious George started it.

The little monkey is trying to maim children with his lead-laden face and construction hat. His poisonous nature has spread to toy monkeys everywhere, creating an army of killer primates on a quest for world domination.

They’ve enlisted the help of testosterone-emitting rapid response vehicles and troop carriers to transport mass groups of monkeys. Rabid, super-pecking ducks — who lull their prey into a false sense of security with their beady eyes — can be seen for miles, marching behind the trucks with a quack-quack-quack.

The chubby, tripped-out frog beckoning you with his enchanting smile? He’s the bad-ass distraction on the northern front.

Beware!

I spat out my tea when this landed yesterday:

One of the most highly-touted Christmas presents has been pulled from shelves because of a poison risk. And not just any poison: if the beads from Aqua Dots are ingested, the coating apparently metabolizes into the hallucinogenic “date rape” drug gammahydroxybutyrate, aka GHB. An overdose can cause seizures, coma or death.

See a Toronto Star story here (thanks, Doodle’s Mom), and the Health Canada official recall here.

Did y’all read that and choke the way I did? This is by far the scariest recall yet.

Continuing with the cheery news, the Skimways “Skippy” pool toy can lacerate hands, bright green whistle flashers from Manitoba Public Insurance can become unscrewed (ok, this one was a little dumb, and far more about being a watchful parent than anything else), the Fisher Price Laugh and Learn Learning Kitchen (I just saw this advertised on TV!) has choking parts, and these fake ugly teeth — the ones kids put in their mouths — contain lead.

Need some cheering up? Go watch thee some James Cunningham! Or see which celebrities are having babies! Or ponder felt veggies!